i continue to exist in various forms, as does plumeria. This is farewell, but i’m open to private conversations with anyone who needs anything clarified or who would like to exchange contact info.
I also can’t feel safe in a public space where people are allowed to talk as much shit as they want about me without anybody pointing out that it’s kind of fucked up, or allowed to make spaces where they can talk shit about me and i’m not permitted to see what was said ( let alone defend myself ). i don’t want to be stuck in a place where i feel provoked into lashing out and triggering people on purpose-that’s a horrible thing to go through for both parties. moreover, somebody needs to show some empathy in this situation, and my accuser has been open about the fact that my presence is a legitimate trigger for them. i don’t like feeling that way, so i’m stopping. I knew sending the anon was wrong, but i really did feel backed into a corner. part of me knew i was burning a bridge part of me wanted to offer one last chance to show some kind of mercy or understanding. it wasn’t nasty, but it did express my feelings, and i knew they would know it was me. The clinching factor for me in deciding to leave was some days later, after more vagues, when i snapped and sent an anon out of anger. since then, the situation has become untenable. after a year of no communication and no interaction with their posts ( in excess of the two messages i sent them, spaced months apart, to let them know i was still confused, hurt and seeking closure over what happened ), they came into my private messages with this conversation, which i really think speaks for itself. My accuser obviously disagrees with me on this point. in my opinion, if you decide to bully someone openly on your public social media, you can no longer tell them they’re not permitted to view your content. i do not consider it stalking to view what’s being said about me in a public space, especially as i have a right to also feel comfortable within that space.
my accuser has a history of nasty vagues and namedrops, against me and others. The nature of the accusations concerns my repeated viewing of my accuser’s blog, an action to which i’m fully willing to own up. my decision in the last year to keep my roleplaying primarily away from tumblr was a result of this situation combined with my poor health at the time. my accuser is an ex-friend, someone who ended our relationship about a year ago for reasons they blocked me before i could fully understand ( but to the extent that i do understand them, i genuinely believe them to have been a matter of miscommunication ). To make a long story short, i’ve been accused of stalking and harassment within the roleplay community.
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